Well if you've been wondering lately why I haven't been acting quite myself and why I've been constantly tired and getting a little pudgier around the hips and waist, it's because...yes...Baby Merrick #4 is on the way on due to be here June 8th of 2011.
I'm excited about welcoming a new little personality into our home, but I'm scared to death thinking about how I'm supposed to add one more element of chaos into an already-chaotic scene. I love how people nanchalantly say, "Oh, after three kids, it's all the same. It's just more kids. You'll do fine."
Seriously? My sanity is the only thing I'm doubting can handle it. Often this comment comes from the mother with a glazed-over look in her eyes, who hasn't showered in two days, who's house looks like it was just hit by an atomic bomb and who's children are running around like little terrorists. I don't mean to sound condescending because usually the crazy lady I just described is me. But I do know there are women that handle four children, and even 6 and 10 children beautifully without any signs of mental break down. Those women are just a little fewer and farther between!
This has definitely been a harder pregnancy with much more fatigue, insomnia (You might be wondering, how can those two go together? They can... trust me) and nausea. I've had to nap every day for at least an hour if I want to make it through to the end of the day. I'm sure Dennis will be ready to have his wife back when the first part of this pregnancy is over!
As fed up as I am with being pregnant and even though I'm seriously doubting my ability to handle four children sanely, it's amazing how as soon as I saw that first ultrasound image, my heart melted and it suddenly all became worthwhile. Interesting how a little black and white picture of something the size of a peanut that looks more alien than human can make a momma's heart swell as big as her edematous legs.
I'm excited to think about having another child that is as special to me as each of my kids are. I wouldn't trade any of them, even the little one inside of me, for all the sleep, sanity or skinny jeans in the world.